Artist's Soul

To be an artist, one must feel, to the point you feel to much.

Wednesday, April 30, 2014

5 Things that Makes Me PO'd

Hey people. It's me. You know who I am. (That was a Stark reference, for those who didn't recognize it. Yeah, I'm an Iron Man fan.)
So yeah, I normally don't do this kind of blog posts, but I was tagged by my friend Clare
 ( http://ohsnapitzclare.blogspot.com) so yeeeeeeeeah...... 

Anyways, these are the five things that makes me upset, mad, angry, boiling, etc.

So, without further adieu, here it is!

1) Nosy People: I'm not someone who is very private, per say, but for those who know me personally, don't keep questioning me on my private life if I already denied access. I keep things to myself for a reason, and whether or not that reason matters to you really depends on how considerate you are to how I handle situations, I guess.

2) Fakes: You can have a hidden side to you, or you can act like differently for different people, but please, don't be someone your not at all. If it's still relatively a part of your true personality, even if it is indirectly, at least make sure it is a part of you. For instance, if you are a total tomboy, and you don't have a single drop of girly-ness in you, then don't act like one. Whether they do it for themselves, parental influence, or societal influence, it just bothers me. 

3) Backstabbers: I honestly can't stand backstabbers. If I consider you a friend, don't mess it all up for some stupid rumor or something. Backstabbing is a past time that is both pointless and very hurtful. Don't spread rumors, or purposely try to secretly ruin your "friend" 's life, just because you are mad, or they annoyed you, or for whatever strange reason humanity can come up with. Just don't do it. (Maybe this one should have been first on the list....)

4) People who stereotype me: This one is kind of personal. I'm a really strange person. As one of my good friends once said, she can't imagine me in any of the usual stereotypical groups in society. I'm weird, but I'm totally fine with it. But when people automatically label me as part of one group, it bothers me inside. Being labeled as part of a huge universal group type makes me feel like I'm being overlooked as an unique individual. 

5) People who act like they know me better than I do: Another personal one. I've met people who, after a few meetings, they believe they know me like the back of their hand. Which, really, isn't the case 99.99% of the time. I'm a complex person, so don't think you've uncovered all my mysteries just yet.

Well, that's all! For this, I tag my friend Erin on  http://adozenblueroses.blogspot.com/!
 Till next time, this was LaMusicFreak. 


MIXED

It all started back in 8th grade. It was the golden year. The year everything was falling into place, and we finally felt something like happiness. But let me start at the beginning. The very beginning…
You probably don’t know my name. Of course, it’s not that you don’t know me. You just don’t know my name. But you've definitely seen me. I’m that girl who sits at the very back of the classroom every day. The one who never talks unless the teacher forces her to, and even then she’s so quiet you can only hear me if the world holds its breath for a minute or two.
Yeah, I’m that girl. The typical “shy” girl that everyone thinks of. But I guess we’re all really stereotypical. Except maybe Alex, but she’s stereotypical in her own, unique way.
And, by “we”, I’m talking about my group of friends, which everyone calls the “FREAKS”. But we don’t care. At least, most of us don’t care. I have a feeling it bothers Danielle sometimes, but it’s not a big problem. I know for a fact that it bothers Alex, but she tries not to let it get to her. Just like how she tries to block out everything else that hurts her in this world. It worries me sometimes, how she suppresses everything in her. But I guess that’s just how she works. She’s the tough one in our group. Just like how I’m the shy one, Danielle is the relatively girly one, Audrey is the sporty, athletic one, and Casey is the nerdy one.
Alex is the tough one in our group. Her full name is really Alexandra, but she hates it, so she doesn't tell most people about it. She’s sarcastic, sharp tongued, and can be absolutely cruel when she wants to be, which is about half the time. She can make a grown man cry, literally. She dresses that way too, all tough looking. She always has this brown leather jacket on, with some black t-shirt underneath it, and grey skinny jeans tucked into a knee-high black suede boots. She has long brown hair that she purposely used to cut it choppily, just to rebel against her parents. Now, she just leaves it super straight, but she always keeps it messily clipped up with a black metal claw hair clip. It reaches about halfway down to the small of her back, and smaller bits and pieces that are shoulder length always fall out of the clip, framing her sharp face. She has defined features, and piercing eyes that are this weird mix of grey and hazel. I've seen her get many second looks from guys when we walk down the hall, but they never tell her anything, because she’s so scary-looking. Too bad though. She could use a “Hey, you’re really pretty” once in a while. She’s like a porcupine. Always raising her quills, just because she feels threatened by the world. It’s a pity, really, since it stops the world from getting to see the real her. But again, I guess that’s just how she works.

Danielle is the girly one out of us. Not that she’s like any of the Queens. Nope, she is definitely a much better person than any of them. But she is girly. She’s one of those people who like spending an hour or so every morning fixing their hair into a new do, putting on just the right amount of make-up to look pretty, but not fake, and picking out their clothes to perfection. She loves to wear floral print, skirts, and Toms, and she has this strange rule that none of us understands. It’s something about never wearing the same outfit twice in exactly 17 days. Why 17, none of us know, but we don’t question her. She has flowing black hair that shines in the light, and she has sparkling soft robin’s egg blue eyes. She’s super skinny, but it’s a healthy skinny, and she’s one of those people that’s not really short, but at the same time, not tall either. She’s like a butterfly, or a canary or some other beautiful animal. Delicate looking and awfully pretty, but perseveres through life just as well as any other. She's super nice to everyone, except if you mess with one of her friends, meaning us. She can be almost as vicious as Alex when she gets mad, but that rarely happens. In fact, it happens about as often as Alex laughing, so pretty much zero to none. Danielle's always trying to get the rest of us to go shopping with her, and Casey usually goes along, and I do too, occasionally. But she has to beg and bribe Audrey to go along, and she literally has to drag Alex into the mall each time.
I met her one fall day after school. Alex had gotten a last minute call from her brother, saying she needed to walk to the high school and find him, meaning I had to walk alone. I was just kind of wandering slowly down the street, watching the autumn leaves fall from the trees. They were awfully pretty, and falling everywhere, and I wondered if I just stretched out my hand, would one fall right into my palm. I doubted it though.
I was zoned out a bit, I guess, because the next thing I knew, I had walked straight into a parked car at one of the small intersections, or crossings, whatever you call them. I backed up a bit, blushing and dazed, and noticed there was a girl inside, in the passenger seat, seemingly panicking and yelling into her phone. She looked extremely dressed up, so I assumed she was one of those popular girls, which caused me to start worrying. The car was small, elegant, white, and real expensive looking. Suddenly, she was getting out of the car, and walking towards me. By then, I was sweating a bit, and I started fidgeting, preparing to run away.

"Hey, are you okay? Sorry I didn't ask earlier, I was a bit distracted. I saw you run into my car," the pretty girl asked me, looking at me curiously. I guess my nervousness was showing, because she smiled at me softly.

Biting my bottom lip, I shakily replied, "Y-yeah. I'm alright."

"Great! Just making sure. Anyways, I'm Danielle!"

"I'm...Nicole. You  can call me Nickie."

"Oh hey! Aren't you in my English class? You sit behind the stupid Queens and the mean jocks right?"

At this, my eyes widened, and I began smiling. So she wasn't one of them. And she seemed really nice, too. Plus, most people just don't notice me at school. I can't believe she actually knew who I was.

"Yeah. I am."

"Cool, so we have something in common! Hey, Nickie, you in for some smoothies or something? The mall is just a few blocks that way. We can walk there! I'm sure my sis won't mind."

I hesitated. I still had an hour or two before I was supposed to get home, and Danielle seemed nice enough. Besides, I had my phone if anything happened.

I nodded, and she gestured for me to get in the car. We ended up getting some iced coffee, and we hung out for an hour or so. I introduced her to Alex the next day, and Alex accepted her offer of friendship, but only because she "hates the Queens like I do", she says, and because "she's real nice, to the point of an overdose of niceness".


Audrey is the sporty one. She’s also one of the only people who will stand up to Alex. She has really light colored hair, so light that it’s almost blond, with streaks of light brown in it. You could say she's somewhat of a brunette. She has caramel colored eyes that have this spark to them, just like how she has sparks in her. She's like a bonfire, warm, inviting, and burning bright with energy. But you should never mess with her, or you will get severely burned. She's pretty tan, what with her running around in the sun all day, and she plays soccer. She dresses like you would imagine a typical athlete, bright shorts, often turquoise, and loose graphic tees. She walks everywhere with her head up high and a happy grin on her face. She’s the one in our group who tells most of the jokes. She also talks, a lot. She can talk on for hours without ever stopping. It’s pretty funny, how she and Alex are pretty much opposites, yet they get along so well. Of course, they do have quite a weird friendship. Audrey bugs Alex non-stop, while Alex glares at her and messes with her. Alex is always saying how she hates Audrey, but we all know she never means it. With Alex, getting her to say she hates you pretty much mean she cares about you a lot. Strange logic, I know, but again, it’s just how she works. Those two met during P.E., and it was partially because of me. It was soccer unit, and Alex and my team got sent to play against Audrey's. She went all out, of course, as this was her thing, I just sort of tried, but wasn't much good, and Alex, well, she just stood at the side, smirking as she watched the game. At one point, Audrey accidentally tripped me when she was stealing the ball, and I landed with a thud. Suddenly, Alex was yanking me back up, and was yelling at Audrey, who had just scored another goal.

“Hey! Just cause you wanna show off doesn't mean you can trip somebody!” she yelled.

This caught Audrey's attention. “Excuse me? It was something called an accident, for your information, and I'm not showing off!

“Really? Didn't look like that to me.”

Audrey snorted. “Yeah? Well I don't see you doing anything but pretending to be cool. What? Can't kick or scared of the ball?”

That was the breaking point. No one ever, ever, challenges Alex. She hates people taunting her, or doubting her skills. She says she gets enough of it from her stupid parents, and that she doesn't need some “stupid kids who don't know left from right” to tell her stuff that like that too.

Alex's eyes were smoldering with anger, and she said, in a low, dangerous voice, “Oh yeah? We'll just see about that. Game on.”

The game resumed, and the tables were turned. As the game went on, Alex and Audrey were head to head, making goal after goal. Eventually, class was over, and the score was tied. It had basically become one on one between those two, and the rest of the teams were on the sidelines, watching in awe. When the whistle blew, they stopped, sweaty, panting, and grinning. Or, at least, Audrey was absolutely beaming in delight, while Alex just smiled a bit. Suddenly, Audrey started laughing and began complimenting Alex, it seemed. Alex started laughing a bit too, then abruptly stopped, and twisted her smile into that grin of hers again. But even that was shocking. Alex barely smiled anymore, much less laugh at all.

For the next week or two, Audrey wouldn't stop pestering Alex about joining the soccer team. Of course, Alex said no every time, to put it nicely. It was more of a “why would I want to join a team with you?”, or a “Heck no, not in my entire next nine lifetimes”. Eventually, Audrey gave up, but by then, the three of us were all close friends. Once in a while, Audrey still brings up the topic, but Alex never says yes. I have a strong feeling she's just scared of having to be on a team, but she just hates to admit it.

The three of us met Casey at one of Audrey's games. It was a really important one, and she wanted us to be there to support her. I immediately said sure, but Alex had said she had better things to do. I still dragged her there, though, since I knew she didn't really. She was just scared of the crowds. But, like usual, she just didn't want to admit it. I know her well enough to just guess each time.

We got there, and after the game, we waited around a bit for Audrey. The three of us were going to the local coffee shop, which was, ironically, called Coffee Shop,  to celebrate her win. I was sitting on the bleachers, pulling my head further into my lavender coat. It was pretty cold out, as it was the beginning of fall, and there was an icy breeze that managed to penetrate cloth. Alex was perched on the fence-wall that separates the field from the audience stands. She was lounging like an alley-cat, with one leg dangling, the other bent, and flicking bits of ripped up leaves into the wind.
She pulled her leather jacket tighter, and muttered under her breath, “She owes me so much for this. You owe me so much for this. You all owe me so much for this.”

I just giggled and said, “Oh please, you know you wanted to come.”

“Doesn't mean I was gonna. It is way too cold out to be sitting on freaking metal bleachers.” Taking a quick scan of me as I was shivering violently, she added, “Stupid, you should've worn more. Buy a hot chocolate later or something.”

I smiled warmly at her. That was her own little way of showing she cared.

Just then, a shrill yelp pierced through the air a few yards down the field. It sounded like it came from under the bleachers. We shared a look, and Alex asked, “Check it out? Could be something worth amusement.”

I nodded, and we sprinted down the bleachers and circled around the back. What we met was a seen so familiar it gave me déjà vu.

A girl was cowering under the raised fists and disgusting, slimy smirks of two high school guys. They had a royal purple notebook covered in stickers of hearts and stars clutched in their hands.
“Please don't hurt me! I didn't do it, I swear!” the girl pleaded the guys. They just guffawed in return.

“Nerd, no one likes you anyways!”

I clenched my fists at that. I saw Alex tense from the corner of my eye, and she swaggered up to the slimy guys.

“So,” she drawled, eyeing them with contempt up and down, “Two freaking idiots who are bored like heck here hmmmmmmmm."

The guys shared a befuddled look and snapped back, “What do you want, emo?”

“Oh nothing, just for you two to GET THE HECK OUTTA HERE!”

At that, the two guys scrambled out with Alex shooting daggers at them with her eyes. Once they were out of sight, she turned to the trembling girl. I did too.

"So," Alex drawled, "You get bothered by idiots often?"

The girl just sighed, smoothed out her shirt, and replied, "Not daily, but close enough. The price of knowledge, the price of knowledge."

Alex just cocked an eyebrow at her strange response.

I decided to cut in with a quiet, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks by the way. Both of you. I'm Casey," she said with a soft smile.

"I'm Nicole, but you can call me Nickie."

We both looked at Alex expectantly, who had moved to lean against the bleachers with one arm, and a cool, uncaring look on her face. She just looked at us, and snapped, "What?"

I just shook my head in amusement. Typical Alex.

"Fine, fine, geez. I'm Alex, etc. Don't call me anything else."


Casey stuck out her hand and I shook it lightly and shortly, giving her a small, hesitant smile. She turned to Alex and also stuck out her hand, but Alex just stared at it with that look that she always gives on her face. It's a look that says "I'm too cool for that and you" mixed with "Are you kidding me?". After a few seconds, Casey just grinned and withdrew her hand.
Instead, she put a finger on her chin, tilted her head a bit to the right and asked, "Is Alex your full name? I simply must know..."

Alex just flicked her side bangs, and replied, "Don't push it, kid."


And that, was the start of a wonderful friendship, at least, most of the time. 

Casey has caramel colored hair that she leaves down and plain, with royal purple glasses always perched on her face. She's petite, frail looking, and kind of pale, considering she's always inside, studying. When she's reading, her glasses slides down a bit, and she just lifts two fingers and pushes them back up. She claims she does it almost unconsciously now, since she always has her nose stuck in a book. She's one of those people classified as a nerd, and it's kind of true. She has an A+ in all 6 of her classes, she never misses a day of school, much less be late, and her grades is the most important thing in life. Anything below a B, and she'll consider it failing, which Alex and Audrey always scoff at, but in different ways. Audrey scoffs because she says Casey worries too much, since she's supposedly "born to be smart and a total bookworm". On the other hand, Alex scoffs because she considers a C+ a passing grade. Of course, Alex's standards for grades aren't very high. I'm not saying that Alex doesn't try at school. She just doesn't like sitting in class, especially the sitting, and in class, while listening to lectures and reading a "bloody boring textbook" parts. Casey, though, loves class. It's where she absolutely shines. All the teachers love her, and she's been getting honor rolls and stuff like that since elementary school. (Audrey jokes that she probably got awards in Preschool too.) Every time finals or exams come along, you can expect not to see Casey's face for weeks, all the way until after she takes the test, because she'll be studying and panicking like crazy. I get along well with her, but she and Danielle are best friends. Danielle encourages Casey, and calms her down when she panics, and Casey tutors Danielle in Science, seeing as Danielle completely blanks on that subject. Casey's kind of like me, meaning she's sort of shy, but when she's with our group, she's not afraid to talk. It doesn't mean she bothers Alex the way Audrey does, but she does tease Alex sometimes.

As for me? Well, I can't say much except that I have pitch black hair that I loosely tie up into a low ponytail, and bangs that are long, and can hide my face. I'm about the same height as Danielle, but just a tiny bit shorter, and Casey says I'm skinny, but I honestly don't know. I don't pay much attention to how I look. I don't like to stand out in the crowd, so I dress plainly. I always have an all black hoodie on, and it's kind of faded, since Alex gave it to me in the 6th grade. I've been wearing it everyday to school since. It makes me feel comfortable, like I have a piece of home with me. I still remember the day Alex handed it to me. It was my birthday, and no one besides my family members had bothered to congratulate me or even remember. Of course, I tried not to let it get to me too much, since that was how it had been since forever, but it still stung a bit. I can't help it. Alex says I just feel too much. I never say that she feels more than me. It would probably set her off.
I was sitting on my front steps like every morning since 3rd grade, waiting for Alex to come strolling casually down the road. Then, I would get up, and walk with her. We rarely talked in the mornings, but we didn't really need to. I'd known her since 1st grade, so silences were never awkward.
That morning, however, she threw something dark and soft at my face when I went up to her. She had already started walking away before I could even react. Catching it, I opened up the crumpled bundle to find that it was a black sweater with a large hood. It looked a few sizes too big, but it looked really comfy.

"Wear it. It's plain, since you don't like showing off and all that jazz. Decided to get it for you, since it's your birthday and all," she called back without looking at me. I grinned, tossed on the hoodie over my clothes, and ran up to walk with her.
I told her in my usual, shy voice, "Thanks Alex. I love it."
She just grunted and replied, "Whatever. At least now you can hide under that hood instead of behind me."

I haven't stopped wearing that thing since. Whenever I felt embarrassed, I would flip the hood up, and just hide from the world. I do that a lot. Danielle says I have confidence issues, but Audrey just waves it off saying I'm just overly shy. Casey once asked me if I have Anthropophobia (I had to check the dictionary later that day. Apparently it means a fear of people.), and Alex just scoffed. I'm not scared of anyone, except maybe those really mean guys and girls in school. I just don't like to stand out in the crowd. Alex is the one who's afraid of people.  Or, at least, she doesn't like meeting new people a lot.


We’re all different. But we’re also all friends. I know cliche. But it’s just how life turned out. But it sure wasn't an easy road.



It was a Friday, so, like every Friday, I knocked on the dusty grey front door of the Hayde house. And, just like every Friday, Andrew, Alex’s older brother, who’s about two years older than us, would open the door, and smile at me. Then, he would say a friendly “Hey, Alex in her room”, and he would say, as I’m walking up the first three steps of the winding wooden staircase, “Knock, pass code”, or, on one of those really bad days, “Locked”. This way, I would know what mood Alex was in that day. Most of the time, it was “knock”, but lately, I've been getting a lot more “locked”. I haven’t heard an “Open” in a few years now. It’s like a faint memory of the innocent days. Or at least, when Alex was still innocent.
 It was a system that I was comfortable with, and we were all comfortable with it. I would spend all of Friday afternoon with Alex, and often times she’d end up staying at my house over the night. Then she’d spend some time with the entire group on Saturday. Then, she’d go back home, late Saturday night, and spend Sunday at home, in her room, or out with her brother.
You see, Alex doesn't have the best relationship with her parents. They feed her, they give her a place to sleep and call “her house”, but it’s never really been her home. No, they don’t beat her or anything like that, but they are really mean to her. I don’t know how many times I've heard Alex tell me, in that fake, nonchalant voice of hers, “They called me a disappointment again. A delinquent. Whatever.”

They verbally beat her down with their “disappointment at their failure of a child”; while she purposely tries to make them even more mad. It’s a vicious cycle, really, but Alex doesn't want to be the one to step out of it. She says it’s like surrendering to them, and she won’t be the weaker side. She hates losing.

This time though, it was different.

As I walked into the door, waving to Andrew, he said with a grimace, “Hey Lynn. Locked. Pretty bad too. This time, they were comparing me to her again.”
Shoot. Those were some of the most painful fights for her.
I walked up the stairs, secretly took out the hidden key Alex keeps, just for me, and slid inside. Alex was lounging on her bed, eyes closed and music blasting out from her headphones so loud I could hear it.

“Lock the door behind you,” she spoke in to the silence. I did as she said, and sat down, cross-legged, on her bed. She slid her headphones off as I got comfortable. She kept her eyes closed to whole time.

After a few moments, I decided to break the ice.

“What did they say this time?” I asked softly.

“The usual. Plus accusing me of smoking,” she replied, scowling.

“But, you hate smoke and cigs’.”

She snorted.
“For parents they sure know me well don’t they.”

I hummed in agreement.

She sighed, and got up. “Come on, I wanna get outta here.”

Here, she stopped, and began to smirk. Her smirk is a twisted, devious smirk. It’s the kind of smirk that makes adults check their wallets, and other kids in school to raise their eyebrows and wonder “What is she planning?”.

She walked over to her window, pulled it open, and leaned out of it, asking me, “I figured out a new escape path through this window, and down this tree. You wanna try it?”

Of course. Leave it up to Alex to think up something like that.

“No thanks. You know I’m afraid of heights. And I'd rather not have broken bones.”

“Aw come on, it’ll be fun! It’s safe, relatively. Sort of.”

I rapidly shook my head. “You know you can just use your front door Alex.”

“No way, I don’t wanna see those stupid adults I’m stuck with for life, unfortunately.”

“Please? For me?”

At my begging, she softened visibly. “Fine, but it’s your fault if I get into another argument.”

I just gently grabbed her wrist and began walking out her room. She followed with a struggle, except for the occasional mutter of "I still wanted to use the tree." as we walked down the staircase.

"Al, going out?" Andrew called out just as Alex was about to step out of the front door after me. 


She just sighed, rolled her eyes, and shouted back, "No duh, genius!", and slammed the door.

I stared at her while she dusted off her hands with a faint, satisfied smirk.

I decided to break the tense silence by asking, "So, where do you want to go?"

"Who cares. Wherever. As long it's not here," she shrugged. The way she said "here" was with utter contempt. I would feel sorry for anyone if she ever talked about a person that way. You could just feel the hate dripping from her like venom.

"The park?"

She just shrugged and said, "Sure, why the heck not."

We started heading down the street towards our town's small park. It's a nice, peaceful grassy meadow with a little metal play structure in the middle. There's a grove of willow trees and an old sliver of a creek to the east, and various oak, pine, and maple trees circle the rest of the park. This is what our group consider's "our territory". At least, to Alex it's ours. The five of us always hang (in Audrey's case, literally) out on the play structure. We all have our own little spots. Alex always chills at the top of the playground, in the tall tower that leads to a long, sleek metal slide. She usually stands and leans over the balcony created by the metal rods, letting the breezes flow around her, staring into the distant view of the town. I curl up at the bottom of the net ladder that leads up to Alex's tower, and Casey sits by me, in the empty square platform that leads to the
 monkey bars to the right, metal twirling ladder to the left, and steps to the front. We both like hiding there because it's comforting, with all the others around us. Danielle always, always sits daintily on the front steps, because she's afraid of dirtying her clothes too much. Audrey loves to swing around on the monkey bars and sometimes, when she's bored of the bars, she moves over to the twirling ladder to amuse herself for a while. She's just too energetic to sit still.

Today was no different, even though it was only the two of us. Alex swiftly pulled herself up onto her balcony, while I sat down at my usual place slowly, looking up at her. She leaned up against the bars, staring at the far row of trees and houses. There was a slight warm summer breeze, so it was blowing her hair and jacket behind her. 


"I want to get out of here. Someday. Soon," she suddenly spoke, shocking me.

I just stared at her steadily.

She continued, without turning to me, "This town's dragging me down. Heck, it's dragging all of us down. We could be so much more than all this, don't you think?"

I was lost. "I guess, but, Alex, I like our town."

She scoffed. "Of course. Everyone but me likes this stupid place."
She finally turned to look at me, gazing down at me coolly. She was poker-faced excellently, but her eyes were dark, stormy, and disappointed. But not at me. No, she didn't look disappointed at me. She was disappointed at something else.

"Alex.....there has to be something you like about here...."

"Like what? You guys are fine, but other than that, what's good about this?"

"Alex....."

She turned back to look far into the distance. Compared to the warm streams of air and the summer sun beating down on us, she looked like a cold shadow, distant and lost.

"Alex, do you miss Britain?"

At this, she tensed visibly.

You see, Alex goes back to England every single summer, from the day after school's out to two days before school starts again. She lives with her Aunt Maybelle and her Aunt's boyfriend Sam during her stay, and she gets along fabulously with the two of them. Her aunt's a young, optimistic lady who knows just how to cheer anybody up, and always encourages Alex. Sam is, from how Alex describes him, a kind, tall guy who "rocked at soccer" (he was the one who first taught her how to play), "rocked the guitar", and "rocked overall". From what it sounds like, those two act more like her parents than Alex's real parents do. Even though they're across the sea from her, they still cheer her on by sending emails and cards. Every fall, Alex returns with a wild grin (sadly it only lasts a few days at most, then it returns to her usual smirk), a happy look on her face, and a really strong British accent (that lasts for months). 

"There's only a few more months left of school. It's not too long right?"

She continued staring into the distance, then said,
“You know, I wonder what’s out there in this world. Out of this town. There has to be more to the world that I can discover.”

I didn't respond. All that could be heard between the two of us was the sound of the wind rustling the leaves of the trees around us.

“All I've ever known was London, and this old place. Same old, same old. No change. It’s like I’m stuck. You know what I mean?”

More trees ruffled their sharp green hair in question.

“We’re all trapped in this, this, this loop! It’s a cycle! A circle! Like one of those black holes in outer space. We get born into it, and only a few of us manage to escape.”

All I could say in response was “Mmmmm…”.

She continued staring out into the distance.

"Hey! You guys!!! HEY!" a voice shouted from a distance. Scrambling to stand up, I saw Audrey racing down a grassy green hill towards us, with Casey hot on her tails, panting, and Danielle delicately stepping downhill behind them, cautiously making her way towards us at a snail's pace. Even from this far away I could see her sour face, and I could almost hear her whining to me about the grass stains on her new shoes.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Alex turn on the top of her tall tower to watch the others speed over to us, or, in Danielle's case, gingerly walk towards us.

Audrey was the first to reach us, of course. She took a huge leap into the air, and landed with a loud "Bam!" onto the steps.

 Up above, Alex slowly and casually leaned back on her elbows against the metal balcony, and rolled her eyes, saying, "Some people are just too loud."

"Oh come on Al! Live a little!" Audrey laughed in reply. Alex just flicked her bangs out of her face and gave a little scoff.

By then, Casey had reach us as well, and was breathing heavily, trying to say something. However, it was always cut short by her wheezing, so it came out sounding like, "Aud-, don't ru-, so, fas-, now I- troub-le-, ca-ing, m- breath."


Audrey grinned sheepishly and apologized, "Sorry Case! Can't help it! I'm hyper right now!"

"You're always hyper, idiot!" Alex shouted to us. The four of us started laughing, as Danielle finally got to the play structure, gently shaking her foot.

"Look! Now my new flats have grass stains on them!" she began whining.

Alex rolled her eyes again, and swung down to the lower decks, saying, "That's why you buy black shoes, not white."


Audrey nodded her head fervently, like a bobble-head toy.

"It's not white, it's cream! And cream matched more of my dresses! I don't always dress in gothic colors, or the same kind of black shading all the time."

Alex smirked. "Beats worrying about stupid grass stains all the time."

"Black is dreary!"

"Black is bold."

"If black is a bold color, the why does Nickie always wear it? She hates standing out."

"Black is bold, but also represents the shadows. It is a double sided color, which gives it depth and a personality."

"Preach it Alex!!!" Audrey shouted to the sky. She started pumping her fist and chanting Alex's name on repeat while she started swinging around on the monkey bars.

Casey turned to me with a pitiful gaze and whispered, "She had coffee this morning."

Ah, that's why she's even more energetic than usual. Of course.

"So, what brings you guys here?" 

Snapping out of my amused thoughts, I raised my head to see Alex once more leaning coolly against the metal bars, eyeing the other three curiously.

Audrey, of course, was all but too happy to shout back, "We got bored! So we figured we could come to the park! Then I saw you standing all dark and gloomy at the top, so I decided we could all hang out together!"

Casey delicately pushed up her glasses, and added, "The bored part is true. However, I must disagree with the last part. I'm pretty sure only Audrey finds making Alex angry is amusing."

"Hey!  What's that supposed to mean? And, yes, it is fun!" Audrey called back. She was in the middle of a flip on the monkey bars. Impressive.

Danielle and Alex sighed in unison, looked at each other with raised eyebrows, then spoke, at the same time, "Seriously?" and "Well. Looks like I have a mimic after me."

We all shared a small laugh, with Audrey being the loudest, bellowing out guffaws, and Danielle and Casey more quiet, amused giggles, and me, with a slight, three second like snicker that could barely be heard over Audrey's noise. Of course, all Alex did was just smirk a bit, and cross her arms across her chest in a smug manner.

A silence came over us after we all quieted down, or, should I say, waited for Audrey to calm down, before it was broken by Danielle asking, "So, did you guys hear about the new transfer student yet?"

The rest of the day was spent laughing, shouting, gossiping, trading stories of what had happened the few days or hours we hadn't seen each other, and telling Audrey to knock it off (which only Alex had to constantly do). 


Wednesday, April 23, 2014

World as We Know it

Oh how this world can be so contradictory. One moment happy, then next, sad. A moment of anger, then, suddenly, silence, tears, and laughter. It is as if the world is a lost child, unable to find itself within this vast realm of reality and dreams.

I am one who suffers these violent mood swings of the world. Each time it swings in the opposite direction, it is like I get a sharp right hook to the face. But then, sometimes it can be so sweet. So tantalizing. So full of, well, life.

What is life, anyways? A dream, or simply a time period where we wander this planet, trying to accomplish things that will immediately become pointless once we exit this place, and enter whatever and wherever is the next? Or is it a lesson, sent to us by nameless, faceless deities above? What is life, and the point of it? Humanity shall never know. But nonetheless, we must do this thing we have called "living", and as the "living", we must feel something called "pain" and "happiness".

Two totally contrasting words, yet, together all the same. Like yin and yang. Happiness makes the pain come all the harsher, and pain makes happiness so much more inviting. Yet, both are out of our control. So we simply must take what we get, and deal with it.

Oh how life can be so contradictory.

Oh how we wish we could change it.

Oh how impossible it truly is.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Mockingbird Mafia

We all know the Golden Rule...
                                       But how many of us actually live by it?

_________________________________________________________________________________

Mockingbird Mafia

What you do, they do back.

~One girl. That one girl with those intense, bright blue eyes that pierce into your soul with one glance. Who is she? She's the sweet whistler. What happens next, you just hope isn't to you. So watch out, because those two short lines with that ever so tantalizing harmony might just cost you your sanity.~

Hush little deary, don't be rude
I'm gonna buy you a mockingbird

_________________________________________________________________________________

Saturday, February 8, 2014

Who'd Done It?

 DECEMBER 15, 2014, 3:48:25 A.M.
Alenstown, California

All was quiet in the small apartment complex of Kent's Creek Apartments. Not a single window had light seeping out. Everyone was asleep. All was normal.

Except for in apartment 14C, in  building F. There, the normality was about to be broken.

 And I get a thousand hugs, from ten million lightning bugs, as they try to teach me how to-

Groaning, a slim arm snaked through the heavy, warm comforters, through the dark, and slammed down onto the glowing smartphone, trapping it under long, slender claws, and slowly dragged it's catch back into the cavern within the mountain of blankets.

"Hyello?" a raspy voice grumbled lightly.

A computer responded. "Mrs. Sariana, you are called upon to report back to A.O.M. within the next two hours of receiving this call. You have been called back to the field," it beeped out.

The computer promptly hung up, leaving an ominous silence hanging still in the air. Slowly, a figure slid out of the layers of sheets and heat, groaning throughout, and promptly fell onto the floor with a loud thud. Only a silhouette of a human body could be seem in the room.

Five minutes later, a small, sleek car blended into the background of the night. It barely made a sound.

All was quiet again.

_________________________________________________________________________________

DECEMBER 15, 2014, 3:48:26 A.M.

Mills-wood, California

Giggling could be heard seeping out from the cracks in the doorway in the second room down the hall, on the second story of house 96, Brigand Drive. Faint yellow light illuminated each corner of the house, including whatever was behind that cream colored door.

"And remember mission 68? Her face was so funny!" a sultry feminine voice laughed out into the night.

A deeper, masculine voice soon followed, chuckling. "I remember. That had been quite an evening to remember. Especially for her," it rumbled.

nostalgic silence soon covered the room. 

"Do you miss her?" the female's voice asked cautiously.

Hesitating, the male soon answered in a hushed voice, "I do. Of course I do. But it was her choice. I wasn't going to stop her."

It was silent once more.

Suddenly, the loud ringing of a telephone shocked the surrounding area, jolting life back into the present.

Picking up, the girl asked, "Hello? Resident speaking."

The same computer voice from apartment 14C answered, "Mrs. Evans and Mr. Greyson, you are called upon to report back to A.O.M. within the next two hours of receiving this call. You have been called back to the field."

It promptly hung up. Within moments, rustling noises of paper cards and thick coats could be heard.

Moments later, a shiny white Benz and a gleaming silver convertible could be seen racing down the road, and far off to somewhere unknown.

_________________________________________________________________________________

DECEMBER 15, 2014, 3:48:27 A.M.

A.O.M. California Headquarters

In an all pure white room, two gray clad figures sat patiently in two huge white chairs.

"So they've all been called?" said one figure.

"Yes, now, we wait," replied the other. "Now, we wait."


Sunday, December 15, 2013

New Beginnings

        Sigh.
I drearily watched the soft, fuzzy gray clouds roll one after another across the cerulean blue sky. 
I sighed again.
The weather lately seemed to be contrary of itself constantly. One day, it would be pouring rain that soaked you to the bone, chilling cold, yet the sun would be smiling down at you in the exact same instant. Today was no exception. Low, heavy clouds forecasting almost certain showers, ice cold breezes that slithered into your sweaters, and cheerful, laughing bright skies with flowers and trees in full blossom. Fall, winter, summer and spring, all into one. Contrary. Just like me.
Sigh.
It seemed like so long ago that everything was perfect, or at least close enough to perfect. My friends were all together, all of us close as could be. No backstabbing. no drama, no me being the third wheel. And when we still talked. Unlike now.
Nope. Now, it's like I've been sucked into a parallel universe. One that made me feel vulnerable, psychotic, and ever so lost.
Now, I have no idea what I say, do, or not do. Now, I spend my nights awake, staring into the darkness, hearing words and thoughts echo over and over and over again, keeping me up even as I was asleep. I doubt every single thing I do. Every. Single. Thing. 
Sigh.
Brrrriiiiiinnnnng
Heaving out another silent sigh, I slowly bent down to pick up my overused, frayed, dusty old white and black checkered backpack, and slowly and steadily stood up from my seat and wandered out the classroom door. I barely registered the noise that whirred all around me, like bees in a hive. Three-hundred sixty degrees, I could here "Bye!", "Hey, wait up!", "Oh, my, GOSH!!! You will NOT believe what happened!", and "See you at the mall later!".
Foreign words that I used to remember.
Slinking down the hall against the wall, I moved toward the front doors at a snails pace. It was like I was in slow motion, watching everyone around me vanish, disappear, and leave as if watching a television program. One by one, people left, excited for the long week off right around the corner, only an hour or two away. Soon, I was the only one left.
It felt so alien to me, yet so familiar, this feeling of being alone. Hearing my own footsteps frightened me, but still sent pleasurable chills down my back. Home. Yet not home.
Contrary.
Why was it me who had to go relatively insane?

**Flashback**
"Hey! Arianne! Wait up!"
Grinning, I turned around to face my best friend in the entire world. But something stroke me as off. 
"'Sup girl! What's up?"
Another strike. Why was her face so different to me today?
"Well, actually, I came to say goodbye."
I was lost. She lived right next door to me? Why would she need to say goodbye? We saw each other every single day.
"What? Are you alright? We 're neighbors remember? You don't need to say bye to me. Did you hit your head or something?"
Another strike. Something was wrong today. Something was very wrong.
"Arianne. I'm not your neighbor anymore. I'm moving. Out of the country. For good."
Moving. Out of the country. For good. Those words echoed in my mind like the sound of gongs.
"W-what? Today? Now? Why? Huh???"
"I'm sorry. Goodbye Arianne. I'll miss you!"
With that, she turned and ran off, leaving me there frozen. Lost.
Pity. That's what had been off about her face today. She pitied me. She knew I would be lost without her. She knew. Yet she still left without hesitation.
**End Flashback**

That day had turned out to be the first of many that I despised. It had been the beginning to my downfall.
Following her move, my other friends soon began to exclude me, leaving me alone, in the bitter cold, friendless. All of my other classmates had been extremely nice to me, but it was always out of pity. I could hear there conversations about me. How poor and sad I was. 
It was what made me decide I didn't need them.

Afterwards, everything just fell apart even more. My best guy friend who I had known since childhood, probably the only one who I was just as close to as my friend who had moved away, began to distant himself from me. He stopped conversing with me, and after a month or two, we stopped talking all together. He began to hang out with his new, cooler friends, and seemingly forgot about me.
And I won't lie. It hurt. I felt even more lost after that.

Sighing again, I pushed open the heavy, freezing metal doors and flinched as a mix of warm and ice cold air was blasted into my face. Stopping, I took in my surroundings. Barely anyone was left in the school parking lot, and the few who were were all chatting casually with their friends, making plans for break no doubt. Occasionally, a car would rumble by with a happy whirring noise.

Once more, I felt lost. I didn't belong here. Not in this world. Not now, not e-

"Arianne."

His voice.

Turning slowly, I gazed at him. He'd grown taller than me now, but it was the same face from before we stopped talking. Hesitating, I opened my mouth gradually, but no sounds came out. 
Blinking, we just stared at each other.  Wind blew and clouds danced across the sky, but it was silent.

"Hey."
With that one word, it held in it a million emotions.
But most of all, it held light. Light that promised to lead me, begging me to forgive. Light for my darkness.

I smiled softly.

Maybe I did belong. And if I don't now, then I'll make myself belong.

This was a new beginning.

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Nighten Mansion

Hey guys! So, I got this new idea for a series of short stories. Basically, it's about this strange mansion deep in the woods, called Nighten Mansion. It's abandoned, but at the same time, it's not. Very peculiar things happen in this mansion, but what exactly is going on? Read to find out!
__________________________________________


The Living Room Spirit(s)
             A living room. The place where most families use to relax. But not in Nighten Mansion. No, here, it was considered the elite room. The place where only the best could enter, and where the best happened. 
            The room itself was large and elegant. Not at all family friendly. In fact, it could be considered as a ball room instead of a living room. Pure cream and light, cloud gray swirls painted in the marble floor reflected images from the ceiling, and a glimmering 10 feet wide chandelier with glittering crystals that threw sparkles in every direction took up the bottom and the top of the room. Looking from the doorway coming in, a cozy, flickering red fireplace was snug in the far corner to the left, while an infinite number of mahogany wooden stairs spiraled up, up, up on the right. A light colored oak bookcase towered above the ground in the middle of the left wall. And, to top it off, a majestic, 42 feet long redwood table stretched across the center of the room. Real gold embellished it's edges, and fingerprint-less glass acting like mirror was pressed into the center of the wooden table top. A single, lone, velvet covered chair was seated at the far end of that table, giving the room a beautiful, but melancholic look.
            So what was so special about this room, besides its fancy furniture? Well, to know that, we would have to wait until the unseen grandfather clock strikes twelve.
         Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong! Gong!
And there it chimes. Twelve. Midnight. Time for magic to begin.

"Awwwwwwwwwwwww..." 
A petite girl yawned. She came out of seemingly nowhere, simple rising out on the marble tiles as if she was emerging from the water in a pool. 
"Well? When are you all coming out?" she asked to the empty room. 
She was, as mentioned before, a petite girl, only about 5 feet in height at most. She had long, sleek black hair that tumbled down past her waist, and sleepy light gray eyes, much like the gray in the marble. Her skin was pale and creamy, her lips a delicate pink. Yawning again, she arched her back and pulled back her arms, stretching out in a cat-like way.
Suddenly, bubbly giggles floated down from above. Glancing up, a skinny body was slowly being built by the many sparkles from the diamond chandelier.
"Always the subtle one, huh Maybelle?" sharp, but soft voice penetrated through the sparkles.
The pale girl smiled and mocked, "Always the giggly one, huh Chrys?"
A full figure had now emerged from the chandelier, and it certainly was a stunning one. It was a skinny, average height girl with glowing golden skin, pearly white teeth, cutting sky blue eyes, and golden strands of hair that floated around in waves down her back. She was perched delicately on the rim of the chandelier, grinning happily as she looked down to meet the marble like girl's eyes.
"Hey, are you really going to party without me?" a loud voice shouted.
Suddenly, a blur of brown slid down the stairway banister and landed on the marble floor with a satisfying thump.
"Stan! Took you long enough! Catch me!" Chrys yelled down, and promptly leaped down from the chandelier. Fortunately, she was caught by the arms of none other than the boy that was a blur before.
           The boy was tall and muscular, but not so much that he looked bulky. Messy, tousled, caramel hair and dark chocolate brown eyes were alive with mirth. A light brown tan dusted his skin, and smooth dark red lips were twisted into a smirk.
           "Good thing I caught, huh Chrys!" the boy laughed. She giggled as she delicately stepped toe first onto the ground, graceful as a swan. Leaning on one leg, the marble girl grinned along with them.
           "Yup! You're my own, personal Superman, Stan!" Chrys exclaimed. Her replies were loud guffaws from her two person audience.
           "Hyper, over-energetic people," a resonating, clear, loud, but at the same time, soft, rounded, and a little hoarse, slightly deep voice scoffed. The other three whirled around to see a dark, shadowy girl lazily lounging, with arms folded behind her head, on the magnificent redwood table. She had long legs and arms, and a tall, skinny, but not as skinny as the other two girls', figure. Shining red-brown hair was loosely twisted up and clipped with a large black clip, and one pitch black eyes was cracked open to gaze sharply at the three excited spirits. Her dark colored lips were expressionless, but if one looked closer, the right corner of her mouth was slightly twitched up. Her skin gleamed like the table, a pale golden color, tan but not tan. She was clad in a deep maroon button up with the long sleeves rolled up, black denim skinny jeans, and sleek umber, knee-high boots.
            Fully smirking now, she taunted, "What? Shocked to hear negativity, or just shocked by my entrance? I thought you knew I loved dramatic entrances!"
Finishing with a loud cackle, she leapt off the table and stalked over to the towering cream-yellow bookcase and gave it a light kick.
"Come on Bookworm, time to wake up and actually enjoy yourself!" she snapped, accenting each word with a slight slap. Soon, a coughing, dust covered boy stumbled and tripped out of the books face first, and landed at her feet.
"Finally, took you long enough," she muttered, spinning around to face the shadows dancing along the walls.
Still coughing, the skinny, pale boy picked himself up while mumbling, "Sorry, I was reading about Shakespeare and I lost track of time."
The girl just scoffed in reply.
Chrys giggled lightly, whispering, "Looks like Leanna missed Aden!"
The girl dressed in darkness, now named as Leanna, whirled around to sharply glare at the bubbly girl as the boy fumbled and toyed with the edge of his honey colored button up shirt. His light umber eyes were cast downward and his pale pink lips kept moving, but no sound came out.
"Please, as if I would miss him. He's nothing but a bookworm."
She promptly slid her gaze over Aden, and pretended not to notice his hurt expression.
Opening her mouth for a retort, Maybelle got cut off by Stan, who quickly interrupted to oncoming mini World War.
"Okay! So, what's up guys? Anything new?" he asked in a panicky voice.
Beaming, Aden opened his mouth and began saying, "Well, actually I just read about this really cool story about-"
"Next topic, bookworm!" Leanna cut in.
Pouting, Aden trudged over to the gleaming redwood table, and sat down next to Leanna.
The girl promptly slid her glance to the opposite direction, causing hushed giggles from Maybelle and Chrys.
Stan chuckled at the two spirits' typical antiques, and commented, "Well, what else is there to talk about? That I got a new coat of polish? Because I did, if you're wondering why I look so good."
He jokingly slicked back his hair and winked at the others.
"Oh please, like you could ever look as good as me, you set of logs. And no, nobody cares if you got a polish, because you look and stupid as ever," Leanna teased, and smirked widely, eliciting a chuckle from Stan, and a soft, unseen smile from Aden.

Monday, November 18, 2013

Lost Paradise: Room of Life

So, new story here! This story will be about a room with painted walls so lifelike that it is almost living, and a young girl who will find the room. To keep this short, and to not give away anything, I hope you enjoy it!
----------------------------------------------------------------------

178 Ridden Street, Gradden Town, New York. It was the average kind of house you would expect to find in a place like Gradden Town. Not truly countryside yet, but definitely not city style either. In-between, average, simple. The house was a gentle, soft, delicate baby blue with a pale, silky cream color accentuating the edges. It was two stories tall, with a one story tall section protruding out of the house. Dusty gray curtains with slightly darker shadow like imprints of flowers were drawn back at each of the long, tall windows that reached from the floor to the ceiling. The colors of spring, full of life, merged in with the vibrant, bold colors of fall in the garden surrounding the house. Birds hidden in bright green chatted about the latest on the grapevine while butterflies fluttered from the many, many, many groups of sweet smelling, eye catching flower bunches, greeting each one one with an open embrace. Honey bees buzzed in circles around the yard, humming cheerful tunes to themselves. There wasn't a garage.


Outside of this isolated paradise was a completely different story. The ominous dark, dark gray clouds hung low and damp above people’s heads. Their feet trudged, leaving scrapes that all lead toward the center of the town, where all the towering buildings were. Specifically, the hospital. The town’s most prominent, most charismatic, most loved artist had finally lost light in her eyes. Not even glasses could help her see now. Sure, they all knew that that day had been coming. It had always been there, a terrible, terrible reminder that left a bitter taste in their mouths. They all tried to forget it, and for moments, they had, but one glance at the desk and the post-it note with all their reminders would shove all of the depressing thoughts into their head again.
Marianne Leanna. Pen-name, Lea. She always had preferred that name. No one knew her last name. As the crowd surged wave after wave towards the doctors and her room in the hospital, like the tide beating down again and again on the rocks on a beach, the doctors tried to be heard. But even with such chaos and noise, the message had gotten through. The town’s precious little Lea was officially blind. That last, earth’s core hot fever she had gotten last week seemed to have taken away her eyesight for good. Born with a wavering eyesight, by the time their Lea had reached the tender, ripe age of 21, just when her popularity reached infinity and beyond, her eyesight had been slowly fading. Then, to add to the trouble, her long, countless hours working in secret, on what the townspeople thought would become her greatest masterpiece, in her studio full of chemically filled air caused her immunity to fevers to decline. Thus, here they were now, with a blind master artist and a suddenly dead silent town.

__________________________________________________


Whhrrrmp-phmp-phmp-phmp, Whhrrrmp-phmp-phmp-phmp

The rhythmic whir, thump, and cranking noise of an old, worn down car steadily grew louder and louder to the sharpened ears of the blind girl who was occasionally sipping lukewarm hot chocolate while sitting, still as a marble statue, on a golden yellow, wooden porch swing. The birds hopped and the butterflies fluttered about her, but, sadly, their efforts for attention were a failure.

Whhrrrmp-phmp-phmp-phmp, Whhrrrmp-phmp-phmp

The noise was abruptly cut off by a loud, piercing slam of the car passenger side door. A cheerful "Bye Sam!" followed shortly after.
Whhrrrmp-phmp-phmp-phmp, Whhrrrmp-phmp-phmp-phmp
Once more, the car revived its song and trailed away, leaving nothing but the faint smell of car exhaust behind it.

Racing as fast as she could while dragging a bag half her size and a backpack on her that ended almost to her knees, a petite 11 year-old girl ran towards the swing.



"Aunt Lea! Aunt Lea!"

The young girl raced, nearly tripped, and jumped with a loud, echoing THUMP onto the wooden porch. The oak tree boards, long dark and bent from years of use, creaked and moaned in protest of the sudden impact.


The older girl calmly turned her head towards the location of the noise, gazing a cool, calm, empty stare in the vague direction. Smiling softly, she shifted on the swing and patted, with her empty hand the newly cleared space. Beaming happily, the younger girl plopped down and twisted her head to face the older girl, who was once more silently sipping her drink.


Laughing at the energetic young-ling, the older one calmly greeted, "Hello Evangelica. Isn't today a beautiful day?"


A small, sad smile suddenly replaced her grin as she replied, "Yes Aunt Lea. It is. The birds are gossiping again today, and the butterflies are up and about."


Sipping her drink, Lea nodded. "Tell me, Eve, what color is the sky today?" With a sad smile, the child replied, "Oh, it's a luxurious shade of bright blue Aunt Lea. It's one of your favorite blues. The kind that's energetic, but calm, smooth and flowing, and very bold." Nodding again in satisfaction, the older girl slowly got up, and started heading towards the front door. Evangelica immediately jumped to her feet and opened the door for her.